Two nights ago, 12-year-old John Milani felt a cool, tingling sensation on his neck as he played Tiny Wings on his phone while laying in bed.  However, to the disappointment of Bernie, a ghost who has been attempting to haunt Milani in recent weeks, the young boy simply assumed a window had been left ajar and continued to play his game.

Bernie, who has been in the haunting business ever since a bookshelf crushed him in the early 1980’s, says that scaring kids never used to be so difficult. “Last Thursday I tried to spook John by miraculously turning on the TV, but he assumed the Smart Remote app on his iPhone was malfunctioning.”

Small-time ghosts like Bernie aren’t the only ones feeling the pain. Casper, “The Friendly Ghost”, also reported struggling in recent months. “I walked up to a girl the other days while she was on her phone. I waved and she assumed I was a Pokemon from PokemonGo. She tried to catch me,” said Casper, sounding extremely unfriendly.

In a time when breaking edge entertainment and technology is available to children at a young age, ghosts will have to adapt in order to compete. Though rumors are surfacing about the creation of an app that assists haunting, nothing has been confirmed.

When asked how he will compete for consumer’s attention, Bernie simply said, “Had I known everyone was just going to become zombies, I would have just stayed dead.”